What I Am (oddly) Thankful For
1. I am thankful for all of the horrible people that I’ve had in my life over the years; without them I would not be the strong, wise person that I am today. You’re not in my life now to read this, but that’s the way love goes (thank you Janet Jackson), and I’m now better for it.
2. I am thankful for the man/woman who marketed the Snuggie™. Anyone who can make a blanket with sleeves a household name is a genius in my book. While I haven’t personally succumbed to his marketing, I’m glad there are brains like his/hers’ in the world. When I finish my book, I want them on my marketing team.
4. I’m thankful for losing my job this past April. It gave me an unprecedented chance to spend a LOT of quality time with my son, and to reflect on what I want to be when I grow up. Oddly enough, I want to be what I was – but I want to do it for myself now. It just took the economy saying “no” to me enough times when looking to get hired to inspire me to start my own business. Will it be easy? Hell no. But it will be done on MY terms, and MY way. No more office politics or corporate B.S. Freedom!
5. I am thankful for Facebook, and the internet in general. Without it I wouldn’t have met a lot of you, or be in touch with friends as often as I currently am. I’m absolutely horrible when it comes to true social interaction, so being able to do it virtually is a godsend. So thank you Al Gore for inventing the internet! And thanks to you too – jerk they made a movie about – that created Facebook!
7. Speaking of TV (blah blah blah), I’d like to thank the inventor of the DVR for allowing me to be completely lazy in my TV viewing habits, and to never have to watch another Viagra® or Cialis® commercial during my favorite shows again! There’s actually some debate over who invented the technology, but I’ll go with these guys. Whoever really did it, kudos!
8. Speaking of inventors (*cough*), thank you to whoever invented instant coffee. I’m not going to bother looking it up, because it will only dispel my delusion that it’s made magically by beautiful faeries and pixies under some far off rainbow. Right next to where they tend the enchanted cows that produce delicious Hazelnut Coffeemate. These two things are my life blood. Without them I would be lost.
9. I’m thankful for the people that work on holidays. Sure, they’re probably only doing it for the extra money they get for “holiday pay,” and not the kindness of their hearts, but I would hate to have to work on a holiday. Don’t think I ever have, really. It’s been a while since I did retail, and times sure have changed since then. Now places are open almost every day, no matter what. Some of these workers probably got the shaft since they’re new and don’t have seniority. Whatever the reason – if you’re out and about on a holiday – thank the people that are working that day. Your last minute forgetfulness of the gravy or cranberry sauce is the reason they are there and not at home with their own families.
10. And finally, on a serious note (although I was totally serious about the other 9), of course I am thankful for all of my wonderful friends and family. Without whom, I would be a total schmuck living in a cave somewhere. You all support me, encourage me, and pull me out of the shell I tend to retreat into. You make my soul smile, and my heart laugh on a regular basis. I can only aspire to be as good of a friend in return. You bring out the best in me, and for that, I am eternally grateful.
Original Publication Date: 11/25/10